Let’s start with some fun nomenclature, because “Ratchet & Clank” can refer to the 2016 movie (which we’ll be reviewing here), a 2016 videogame, as well as a series of games on PlayStation that started in 2002.

That out of the way, we wish we had spent the 94-minute runtime of this movie playing any of those games. While this is by no means a bad movie, it is an entirely unoriginal piece of inoffensive throwaway that we’d feel disingenuous calling “good”.

Cliches and tropes abound; you only need to watch the below trailer to see why. It starts you off with the “in a world…” garbage that is only slightly better than “once upon a time”.

But let’s back up for a minute. Ratchet & Clank (the movie) takes you on a galactic adventure featuring the two titular characters. If this movie was trying any harder to be Star Wars: A New Hope, it would be called The Force Awakens. Ratchet is the Luke here, the furry hero who begins his journey as a talented mechanic on a desert planet, only to be uprooted by the arrival of a friendly robot named R2-D2 Clank. They go on a journey of self-discovery while fighting bad guys and winning the day. Hurrah.

Sadly, there’s none of that Star Wars magic to make it interesting. The entire cast (which, for some reason, includes Sylvester Stallone) delivers serviceable performances across the board to give voices to the animation. And the animation is really nothing special – it’s like the 3D character embodiment of the colour beige. Sure, it fills a wall alright, but it’s not that much fun to stare at for an hour and a half. 

The music and action is exactly the same; competent enough to fill the screen, but there’s nothing you’ll care to remember five minutes after leaving the theater.

And the writing… gods the writing. In videogames we’ve come to (unfortunately) accept poor plots and story because, between them, we get to shoot guns or race cars or… anything really. When the writing is this bad in a movie, you’re just left bored and wanting to do something else.

Now that we’re done kicking this movie around, you may suspect that it’s a terrible showing all around, but it isn’t. Unlike butcheries of source material such as Hitman: Agent 47, Ratchet & Clank (the movie!) gives the audience some colourful characters doing exciting stuff. While Hitman: Agent 47 was offensively bad, this movie is just passively okay. It’s the videogame movie equivalent of a nonchalant shrug, which is always preferable over a stab in the heart.

Now we have to end off with a recommendation, or the lack thereof. If you like the Ratchet & Clank games series, or you’re a new convert thanks to the most recent game, give this movie a watch. It doesn’t pervert the material and, if anything, it’s a nice piece of auxiliary fiction for the story. If you have (or are) a kid looking to watch an animation, this should get your ticket money over Kung Fu Panda 3.

If you don’t fall into either of those groups, give this a miss and pick it up when it hits the bargain bin or streaming service to see another failed attempt at making a great videogame movie.

Verdict Lacking the kind of writing that would make a movie watchable, and gameplay that would make a game playable 50%